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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24981616">breathe, cas</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/esmethenightdemon/pseuds/esmethenightdemon'>esmethenightdemon</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>destiel one shots [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Supernatural</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Castiel Has Self-Worth Issues (Supernatural), Castiel/Dean Winchester First Kiss, First Kiss, Fluff, Homeless Castiel (Supernatural), Human Castiel (Supernatural), Human Castiel in the Men of Letters Bunker (Supernatural), M/M, Newly Human Castiel (Supernatural), No Gadreel (Supernatural), One Shot, POV Castiel, Protective Dean Winchester, Season/Series 09, Short One Shot, Soft Dean Winchester, god i love these gays, it's temporary tho, minor hurt/comfort</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 01:55:07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>844</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24981616</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/esmethenightdemon/pseuds/esmethenightdemon</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>cas needs to remind himself to breathe.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Castiel/Dean Winchester</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>destiel one shots [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1744231</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>91</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>breathe, cas</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/ribinapan/gifts">ribinapan</a>.</li>



    </ul></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>breathe, cas</em>
</p><p>cas wakes up on earth. it's completely disorienting. he should be in heaven, smiting metatron. but he's human now. <em>human</em>. </p><p>he's watching the rest of his brethren fall from the sky when he chokes all of a sudden. there's a burning feeling in his chest, racing up the sides and engulfing the place where he knows a human heart should be. he inhales sharply, out of an instinct he didn't know he had stemming from a fear he didn't know what to do with, and the burning eases. he's hyper-aware of the heart now beating in his chest; the slow rise and fall of the breaths he now has to take to survive. <em>oh, lord above. he's HUMAN</em>. </p><p>
  <em>breathe, cas</em>
</p><p>he constantly needs to remind himself to breath. he finds himself holding his chest completely still only because he's used to it. it's only when he starts to feel his heart race and the burn start to build in his chest again that he exhales the breath he hadn't realized he was holding. </p><p>hael notices, but says nothing. cas assumes its because she doesn't care, so long as he doesn't kill himself in the process. a new sense of discomfort washes over him. he wouldn't be in this situation if he was still an angel. <em>none</em> of them would be in this situation if he wasn't so disgustingly naive. </p><p>
  <em>breathe, cas</em>
</p><p>he likes to imagine that the little voice in his head reminding him to breathe is actually dean. when he's lying down to sleep at night in the homeless camps, it's the green-eyed hunter whispering in his ear, <em>it's okay, you can breathe, you won't die in your sleep, okay sweetheart?</em></p><p>well. dean wouldn't call him sweetheart. but in the safety of his own head, he indulges himself in the feeling that he would. </p><p>and when he wakes up gasping because in his dreams, dean dies in his arms and there isn't anything he can do about it because he's human, he lets the fabricated dean soothe his fear. </p><p>
  <em>breathe, cas</em>
</p><p>"CAS!" </p><p>cas sucks in a breath. he looks around, confused. that was dean's real voice, not the one in his head. he looks up into the relieved eyes of dean winchester. out of the corner he can see sam slumped on a wall, but it's no matter. his hunter was in front of him, a look of euphoria on his face. </p><p>"how did you....dean, i was dead," cas said softly, trying to sit up. dean's hand came up on his shoulder, holding him in place. dean shrugged, smiling slightly. "i threatened her with death, and then gave it to her anyway. she deserved it. are you okay?" </p><p>cas nods. "i'm fine." he tilted his head towards the younger winchester. "he'll be okay, right?" dean chuckled. "yeah, he'll be fine. let's get you home, kay?" </p><p>
  <em>breathe, cas</em>
</p><p>dean notices quicker than hael. </p><p>"cas, buddy.... are you having trouble breathing?" </p><p>cas looks up from his burrito. he exhales, the burn normal at this point.</p><p>"not....necessarily. i just forget to sometimes." deans brow furrowed in confusion and concern. </p><p>cas sighed. "when i was an angel, i didn't have to breathe. obviously. and this transition has been hard so i've been subconsciously holding my breath, like i was still an angel." cas shifts uncomfortably and takes another bite of his food. </p><p>cas had been home at the bunker for a while. dean made sure cas was okay and even turned away cases to take care of the former angel. sam couldn't stop laughing at dean's antics and cas had a feeling he was missing something other than how an angel helped sam recover so quickly from the trials. he was okay with it though, he was positively thriving from all the attention from dean.</p><p>dean walks around the table cas was sitting at and pulls out a chair just as cas finished his burrito. dean reached out and gently placed his hand on cas's back.  <em>touching me is not going to help the situation, dean, </em>cas thought.</p><p>dean drew small circles on cas's back, and cas slowly relaxed, leaning into his touch. cas's head settled on dean's shoulder and dean removed his hand from ca's back and instead wrapped it around his torso. their chairs make it a little uncomfortable but cas is content. he glances up at dean and is pleasantly surprised to see dean staring back. he finds comfort in the forest green eyes. his breathing almost stops again at the look of reverence in them. </p><p>he isn't sure who initiated it, but dean's lips are on his and the breath he was taking stuck in his throat anyway. the kiss was completely chaste but exactly what both of them needed. dean's mouth moves gently with his and cas is grasping at the front of his shirt. </p><p>it's over all too soon and cas is slightly disoriented. dean runs his fingers along cas's hipbone and says, "it's okay." </p><p>cas leans into dean's chest, still not breathing. </p><p>"breathe, sweetheart." </p><p>cas does.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>your bitch is really back at it with human cas fics. </p><p>this one goes to the Birb themself Aly for helping me with the idea for this. hope you all enjoyed it &lt;3</p></blockquote></div></div>
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